Losing a loved one is traumatic for anyone, but even more so for children. Death is difficult for young people to comprehend so along with overwhelming sadness, children may experience confusion as well.
Here are some suggestions on how to support your child through the grieving process:
Be a good listener
Your child may not be ready to talk about grief immediately and may not say anything at all – this is completely normal.
Children deal with bereavement at their own pace and in their own way, but they must discuss the loss in time. Make yourself available to listen to them whenever they need you. Although you may be having difficulty with the loss yourself, your child needs to be able to express their emotions to you when they can.
The stress that follows the loss of a loved one can also be partially reduced by ensuring you have adequate funeral cover. This will mean that you can devote your full attention to supporting your child. When helping them deal with their grief, always respond simply and honestly, and encourage them to express their feelings.
Different methods to try
Knowing how to help a child cope with loss is particularly difficult, as their feelings are completely unfamiliar to them. Allow their grief to follow its natural course without any major interference.
A good step in terms of dealing with grief is to give your child suggestions for activities that may help release some of their pent-up emotions. If they're very young, a child may express their feelings through colouring with markers or crayons. Music and the written or spoken word may also help if your children are slightly older.
You can suggest any of these methods to your child, but you must not impose any specific coping mechanism on them. Everyone has their own way of dealing with grief and they should be able to choose what is right for them. Along with the above methods, you may also want to employ the services of a professional child therapist. This is the most direct way of dealing with a child’s bereavement.
Your child's grieving process is normal
You may be tempted to push your child into coping with their grief in your way and in your time, but it’s best to let it happen naturally.
Children are usually unsure about death, meaning that funerals and other rituals may make them uncomfortable. Although they should be invited to attend these events if you feel they are mature enough to cope, they should never be forced to attend.
Having adequate funeral cover will remove some of the stress during this difficult time and allow you to focus on supporting your loved ones. Hollard is the leading provider of funeral cover in South Africa and provides affordable and flexible funeral insurance solutions for you and your family.
